I don't know these people.......
So last night was a family event night. Those that know me know that I am the youngest of seven kids and have parents that are a good bit older than me. It's fine. That's my life and that is the cross I was born to bear. It's called being CATHOLIC.
That's what you get when you are the product of a strict, ultra Catholic family that believes in family planning. Pop out a kid, wait 3-4 years, pop out another kid, abstain, use no other protection other than God's will and hope that the "pull out" method works every time. So as a result, you have this huge families with 7 kids or so where the oldest kid is about 23 years older than the youngest kid.
That's my life and I always view family gatherings with a great deal of amusement as I still realize that when my family gets together, I realize that I STILL do not know these fucking people. Seriously.
At this point in my life, I am still getting to know my oldest brother and I find out things about him that make me go "what the fuck!".
So last night was another opportunity to hang out with these strangers and always, I come away both confused and amused. Don't get me wrong, I actualy LOVE my family and they have gotten me through some very tough periods in my life.... but I still don't know these fucking people.
BROTHER #1 - the oldest brother. He is a good 28 years older than me and I actually have a niece that is older than me. I really don't know alot about him except he likes to party, owns a liquor distributorship, and gives me bottles of Patron whenever I need them. He also loves Virginia Tech football and revealed himself to be a staunch Democrat when for years have secretly resented him for being a George W Bush supporter. Seriously, that blew my mind.
Also, his daughter, my niece, has resented me most of my live because I took a lot of childhood attention away from her because I was the youngest. My niece has twin boys which are ill behaved and yes, I am a great uncle. I feel hella old.
SISTER - The only sister of 7 kids. My family is not good at producing females apparently. She has probably changed the most of any of my siblings as I grew up as I really think she tried to make me a little sister when I was younger. Apparently, she hoped that every kid my parents had would be that sister but no dice.
To be honest, she is kind of a bitch and is really kind of two faced. Her husband is Stan from "American Dad". He has had a career in the CIA and FBI and has been more of a brother to me than a random brother in law. He loves that GW Bush though and both he and my sister are kind of zealous Repubs. Karma has rewarded them with two hellcat sons.... one of the sons had a kid out of wedlock (a mortal sin in their eyes) and as fate would have it, their grandkid is a boy as well. So far, the boy to girl ratio in my family is 6 boys, 2 girls. It gets worst.
BROTHER #2 - Is 21 years older than me and probably the brother I am the closest with. He has two sons, one years older than me and the other my age. He is a staunch Democrat and really has supported everything I have ever done. His kid is basically my twin brother and of all the siblings, probably spend 75% of my time with this brother and his family. In a lot of ways, he is my substitute dad as my Dad was 50 when I was born.
His oldest son was the first kid to bring bastard kids into the family as he had a son when he was 18. It was interesting to hear the snarky comments my sister made until her kid had a bastard kid a few years later. See what I was saying about my family producing boys? It's an 10-2 count so far with the kid and grandkid count.
BROTHER #3 - Kind of the "loser" of the family although he and I get along very well. He had 2 failed marriages and each of his ex wifes were equally psychotic. He is a Boy Scout executive and even though he is really right wing, he keeps it to himself and is really accepting. His first daughter is a spoiled brat and has a spoiled brat daughter that she is pushing into beauty pageants at an alarmingly early age. (insert eye roll). He had a son and a daughter from his second marriage and despite having a psychotic mom, they seem very normal. It's weird as even though this brother is kind of the "black sheep" his kids seems to adore him the most.
He did bring some estrogen into the family though as we are now at 12-5.
Now at this point, my parent went about 10 years without having kids. Apparently four was enough. Then came:
BROTHER #4: This one confuses me as we are only 8 years apart but as much as I think I know him, I know him even less. He's been married twice and the second wife is overbearing and a loon. But she is fun. Her Dad looks like John McCain and that kind of creeps me out but the real change is my brother. He used to be this really fun hellraiser, now he is a huge Republican. On every aspect except the gay marriage thing. He thinks that is fucking stupid. But other than that, he is a GW Bush clone.
He seems to be constantly changing. He used to drink alot, then found God and stopped, then apparently got pissed at God and drinks again. He's fun though and I love spending time with his right wing ass. He has a boy and a girl that I adore and his kids are the reason I want to have kids one day,
BROTHER #5: My closest sibling is also the most frustrating. I really don't know him anymore. I used to raise all kinds of hell with this guy, and did all kinds of things that make you fondly remember your childhood. Then he met a rich girl, got married, became a Republican and changed. Weird. He already ahs 2 boys, which makes me wonder how many kids they are going to have. His wife is determind to have a girl .... but as you can see, boys outnumber girls 17-6 so far....
I dunno why I posted all this shit..... but really after last night, all I know about my family is on this page.
Am I really that detached....
So last night was a family event night. Those that know me know that I am the youngest of seven kids and have parents that are a good bit older than me. It's fine. That's my life and that is the cross I was born to bear. It's called being CATHOLIC.
That's what you get when you are the product of a strict, ultra Catholic family that believes in family planning. Pop out a kid, wait 3-4 years, pop out another kid, abstain, use no other protection other than God's will and hope that the "pull out" method works every time. So as a result, you have this huge families with 7 kids or so where the oldest kid is about 23 years older than the youngest kid.
That's my life and I always view family gatherings with a great deal of amusement as I still realize that when my family gets together, I realize that I STILL do not know these fucking people. Seriously.
At this point in my life, I am still getting to know my oldest brother and I find out things about him that make me go "what the fuck!".
So last night was another opportunity to hang out with these strangers and always, I come away both confused and amused. Don't get me wrong, I actualy LOVE my family and they have gotten me through some very tough periods in my life.... but I still don't know these fucking people.
BROTHER #1 - the oldest brother. He is a good 28 years older than me and I actually have a niece that is older than me. I really don't know alot about him except he likes to party, owns a liquor distributorship, and gives me bottles of Patron whenever I need them. He also loves Virginia Tech football and revealed himself to be a staunch Democrat when for years have secretly resented him for being a George W Bush supporter. Seriously, that blew my mind.
Also, his daughter, my niece, has resented me most of my live because I took a lot of childhood attention away from her because I was the youngest. My niece has twin boys which are ill behaved and yes, I am a great uncle. I feel hella old.
SISTER - The only sister of 7 kids. My family is not good at producing females apparently. She has probably changed the most of any of my siblings as I grew up as I really think she tried to make me a little sister when I was younger. Apparently, she hoped that every kid my parents had would be that sister but no dice.
To be honest, she is kind of a bitch and is really kind of two faced. Her husband is Stan from "American Dad". He has had a career in the CIA and FBI and has been more of a brother to me than a random brother in law. He loves that GW Bush though and both he and my sister are kind of zealous Repubs. Karma has rewarded them with two hellcat sons.... one of the sons had a kid out of wedlock (a mortal sin in their eyes) and as fate would have it, their grandkid is a boy as well. So far, the boy to girl ratio in my family is 6 boys, 2 girls. It gets worst.
BROTHER #2 - Is 21 years older than me and probably the brother I am the closest with. He has two sons, one years older than me and the other my age. He is a staunch Democrat and really has supported everything I have ever done. His kid is basically my twin brother and of all the siblings, probably spend 75% of my time with this brother and his family. In a lot of ways, he is my substitute dad as my Dad was 50 when I was born.
His oldest son was the first kid to bring bastard kids into the family as he had a son when he was 18. It was interesting to hear the snarky comments my sister made until her kid had a bastard kid a few years later. See what I was saying about my family producing boys? It's an 10-2 count so far with the kid and grandkid count.
BROTHER #3 - Kind of the "loser" of the family although he and I get along very well. He had 2 failed marriages and each of his ex wifes were equally psychotic. He is a Boy Scout executive and even though he is really right wing, he keeps it to himself and is really accepting. His first daughter is a spoiled brat and has a spoiled brat daughter that she is pushing into beauty pageants at an alarmingly early age. (insert eye roll). He had a son and a daughter from his second marriage and despite having a psychotic mom, they seem very normal. It's weird as even though this brother is kind of the "black sheep" his kids seems to adore him the most.
He did bring some estrogen into the family though as we are now at 12-5.
Now at this point, my parent went about 10 years without having kids. Apparently four was enough. Then came:
BROTHER #4: This one confuses me as we are only 8 years apart but as much as I think I know him, I know him even less. He's been married twice and the second wife is overbearing and a loon. But she is fun. Her Dad looks like John McCain and that kind of creeps me out but the real change is my brother. He used to be this really fun hellraiser, now he is a huge Republican. On every aspect except the gay marriage thing. He thinks that is fucking stupid. But other than that, he is a GW Bush clone.
He seems to be constantly changing. He used to drink alot, then found God and stopped, then apparently got pissed at God and drinks again. He's fun though and I love spending time with his right wing ass. He has a boy and a girl that I adore and his kids are the reason I want to have kids one day,
BROTHER #5: My closest sibling is also the most frustrating. I really don't know him anymore. I used to raise all kinds of hell with this guy, and did all kinds of things that make you fondly remember your childhood. Then he met a rich girl, got married, became a Republican and changed. Weird. He already ahs 2 boys, which makes me wonder how many kids they are going to have. His wife is determind to have a girl .... but as you can see, boys outnumber girls 17-6 so far....
I dunno why I posted all this shit..... but really after last night, all I know about my family is on this page.
Am I really that detached....
posted by Feeling Blue in a Red State at 9:24 AM
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